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Archive for November, 2014

Monday Muse November 24th 2014

Posted by jackiepope on November 24, 2014

Monday Muse 24th November 2014

Warning – tongue in cheek…. (no not really – I mean every word)

Monday Muse

Good morning ladies, gentlemen and those yet to make up their minds…

It is that ‘time of the year’; it seems that office parties start in November now because people have so much going on in December, and everyone wants to fit everything in. People are working themselves up with plans and shopping lists, who is going to sit next to whom, who has the children in the morning and who gets them in the evening. It is all such an emotional bomb waiting to go off – and guaranteed if something can go wrong – it will.

I have written about this before, but feel there needs to be a reminder that it is just one day; and we invest so much feeling, emotion and expectation for that one day. It is the day you want everything to be perfect, for everyone involved to get along and love one another. It is the day you want family, friends and ex’s to co-operate. It is a lot to expect from one day – 24 hours.

Perhaps it is time to take the pressure off, and make Christmas a longer celebration, so that every day is special and it does not matter if you have the children on the 24th, and he has them on the 26th;  you visit Mother on the 25th and have all the in-laws over on the 22nd. I think it would work so much better. Let’s spread the load and take the Twelve Days of Christmas to heart. One of those days being that everyone stays in their own home, and celebrates with their own family. The only driving to be done is to get to the beach for a bbq and a swim if it is not raining mind you I swim in the rain – it is way more fun.

12 Days of Christmas then incorporates Midsummer (on the 21st) which is my summer celebration (my belief system has Yule in June – far more appropriate for roast dinners and Figgy pudding) and I am sure that there are other religious holidays in that time; the thing being we can celebrate as a multi-cultural nation. All sorts of decorations can be put up, not just Santa. I do like a tree with fairy lights (no decorations though) because having lights is welcoming in the sun. Anyway it is a thought. It means office parties can be in November – November Madness; and the rule will be that all parties will be over and done with by 30th November; all Christmas cakes, chocolates and champagne will be delivered to clients and customers; and there is nothing left to do but tidy up desks ready for the 12 Days of Christmas.

Not everyone will have 12 days off – it would be a choice of course; and shops would be open etc etc. But the 1st day of Christmas would be list making – deciding what gifts to give and setting budgets; the 2nd day of Christmas will be food and beverage planning; thus the 3rd day will be distributing responsibility throughout the family as to who is going to buy what. Then it is about scheduling the different gatherings depending on how big the family. Working out the children with the ex – and it will work because your ex can have the children all day, and overnight and if they fill them up with sugar they suffer the consequences instead of dropping them off to you in the afternoon tired, hyper and grumpy!

The 4th day of Christmas you could have ‘in-law’ day preferably at their house, and take a break on the 5th day because you will need it after Auntie Flo’s really bad mince pies (the fruity kind) and sister-in-law’s raw fish salad. The 6th Day you might need to go out foraging and gathering to replenish supplies with an especial visit to the bottle store because tomorrow is ‘children’s day’ which means you get all the children – yours and your partner’s, and a few strays. Make sure your glass is topped up all day, and rope in a teenager who is excellent at face painting and playing games, worth every penny of the $30 you pay them.

The 7th day of Christmas you take a day off to recover from children’s day and breathe a sigh of relief because your children are at the ex’s place and it is their turn to cope with squeals, high pitched laughter and checking that the food is free of allergens. Have a romantic night, go to town, a concert or the movies.

The 8th day of Christmas is parent day; when you entertain your parents. This can be a half day affair, they do get tired; breakfast is always good and easy to cook or go out to a café and load them up with pancakes and bacon. Older people are just as prone to sugar highs and tantrums (I know, because if I have too much sugar I become quite a horrid child) and it is best to get them home before lunchtime after a turn around the park. Or pick them up early evening, give them roast and Yorkshire pudding, they will be dozing off by 7.30pm and the evening is all yours.

The 9th day of Christmas is non-family day; the day of friends and acquaintances. Everyone doing the rounds, having beers, BBQ and lots of laughter. Be careful of friends flirting with each other who do not belong to each other, and check the bathroom and your bedroom at regular intervals to make sure nobody is taking the joy and love of Christmas too far. Also make sure you have all the presents you have been given displayed on various shelves, and yes you do have to use the Buddha shaped electric peppermill, your friend went to a lot of trouble (or the Pakuranga markets) to find you such a perfect gift.

The 10th day of Christmas is clean up day; you need to do a quick whizz round with the vacumn cleaner and the mop. Scoop up the mini Vietnamese rolls a la Masterchef (your friend’s new man who made them is a foodie… really?) from the back of the sofa and out of the pot plants (nobody liked them!). Watch movies all afternoon, and let the children make a waterslide out in the back garden and get as muddy as they want. Fish and chips for supper, with a Tip Top Trumpet for afters, how kiwi can you get?

The 11th day of Christmas is making sure that you have paid everyone their due attention. That nobody is left out. There may be one or two visits to make to friends who are a little further out of town (why are people moving to Hamilton – that is not a commute it is a road trip!) but then it is fun to stop at the end of the motorway and load up on Maccers for breakfast. Country friends and family always put on a good spread and if you are lucky there will be roast lamb or lamb racks on the bbq and the neighbours homemade wine. You might have to stay a bit longer before you are under the limit to drive home.

The 12th day of Christmas. You make sure the fridge is loaded with cold stuff to eat – no cooking allowed; no driving allowed (unless you are doing a family trip to chill out at the beach); nobody is allowed to visit. It is just and yours. And if you are alone – oh the bliss of having a stack of books and dvds, chips, dip, crayfish and mayo with fresh bread. Nap when you want, watch Dr Who circa 1972 and ignore the phone. Yes the 12th day of Christmas is a no ipad, phone, pc day – no personal attachments allowed. Just people stuff – you know talking, reading and playing being real humans….



Monday Muse November 17th

Posted by jackiepope on November 17, 2014

Monday Muse 17 Novembers Doom

Good morning ladies, gentlemen, and those yet to make up their minds..

Words…. Are very important to me. I enjoy them.  I nearly typed ‘love them’ but pulled back. I have set myself a challenge to not use the word love for everything. The whole meaning of the word love has been diminished. We use it for everything. So I am making an effort to use different words to describe what I like, so that when I use the word love it is in its truest context.

Why the thing with words this week? It all started when a friend came for coffee; and she told me I was brave; and I said bollocks, I am not brave at all. She insisted I was and so conversation went backwards and forwards until I realised that her meaning of the word brave was totally different to mine. I wonder how often that happens? In this instance it did not cause an argument or insult. But I wonder how often we use words in conversation that the person we are talking to has a totally different value or interpretation on that word?

It is a bit like customs when it comes to other cultures. The things we do in our culture can be an insult in another country. And so I think it is with words. I wonder if the time has come to be more thoughtful of the words we use; and to make sure we understand the meaning of those words.

In our language words that are supposed to carry weight (such as ‘love’) have lost their value. Another word that many of you know I dislike using is ‘Spiritual’. It covers such a wide range of stuff! Someone says they are ‘spiritual’; what is that really saying?  They belong to the Cult of Rainbow Unicorns? I know I am being sarcastic. I am sure you grasp my meaning.   It is time to bring value back to the word ‘spiritual’. It evokes the essence of someone who has a deeper grasp of life, of themselves, and that they have a philosophy, a practice that sustains their life.
And so words… they carry messages. How they are spoken and written is so important; and yet we are so lax with how we craft sentences and paragraphs. I would have thought in this day and age of emails, text and Facebook that the art of writing would improve; that people would be more aware of how to express themselves. But that does not seem to be the case.

So my challenge to you this week is – not to ‘love’ everything, but to use different words to describe.

I would also say that this last week many of you have been a little topsy turvey, and not 100% in your energy; and feeling just a bit odd. You should have turned that corner yesterday or doing it today. The energy will seem smoother and easier. The rain is fabulous here, a good cleansing before the summer hits us. Don’t complain about it, instead dance in it! It is washing us clean of the energies that have been swirling about.

Light lots of candles over the next week to bring super energies into your life. Summer is about fire, and fire welcomes the sun.
A bit of an all over the place muse today, but there you go; that is what musing is all about. I might have gone on further about the spiritual stuff, but I think that is another muse all on its own.


Monday Muse 10th November 2014

Posted by jackiepope on November 10, 2014

Monday Muse

My daughter and I have a tradition – whenever she comes over we watch Jeremy Kyle; when she was at school and a teenager it was Judge Judy after school; we would sit, have a coffee and download the day. Last night we had delicious roast pork (no, I did not cook it, Marco Polo Roast does it beautifully) and found an episode of Jeremy that we had not watched.

It was an interesting one in that the Son of 22 had bought his mother to the show to try and get his relationship with her back on track; Mother had a 23 year old boyfriend and was trying to say she had changed her life. The thing both Elaine and I noticed was that the Mother was not listening to her son; he did not care that she had a younger boyfriend; he understood why she split with his Father but needed resolution with her on some stuff. All she could do was talk over him (yes I know that is what talk shows are about) and all she could say was that she had changed her life, she was a different person, so accept that and let’s move on. I thought for a moment – she is not listening, she is so intent on getting her point across, so intent on being heard that she was losing a wonderful opportunity to reconcile with her son.

He challenged her over something or other; and she said that her other children had accepted everything why couldn’t he? He just said – listen to me and I will tell you. But of course she kept talking.

So I got to musing and thinking about how often we listen, really listen to someone else? That we listen to their story, what they have to say uninterrupted; without layering our point of view, our needs, our wants before the story is even told. And even if we do listen to the end of the story, do we acknowledge what we have heard, and acknowledge that this is that person’s truth and we honour that? Or do we tell them what to do; what we would do, what our opinion is, and what our truth is? And then do we push that truth forward wanting the other person to take it on board?

The person may ask for an opinion or advice. But they may just need to be heard. It is important to allow someone to tell their story, because in telling us, uninterrupted they will hear themselves, and will gain clarity and direction simply from being able to download and sort it out in their head whilst talking.

Of course some people bang on and on; and you hear the same story time and time again, and the person never makes a change; they keep complaining about how sad and difficult life is, and they cannot do anything about it. Listen once, perhaps listen twice but the third time point out that you have heard it all before and until they make those changes you are not interested; or simply make an excuse and walk away. Because the art of listening is just that – it is an art form. To know when to let someone talk the night away because you know they will find their own solution in the words – you are a sounding board; to know when to add to the conversation; to know when to have healthy debate and agree to disagree; to know when what you are listening to is not worth your time.

Listening is part of our spiritual learning. Judge Judy says God gave you two ears and one mouth for a reason. How true. And Wyrdsisters has a motto: Be still, listen to the silence, and let your soul catch up.

How many of you have not listened to the silence lately? Are you finding that life is so busy, that you feel quite disconnected sometimes, and always seem to be playing catch up emotionally, physically and spiritually? All it takes it five minutes silence – longer if you can. No playing music through ear plugs, not with the television on in the background. But simple silence. That does not mean no sound – because when I sit in silence the birds are singing, there are people doing stuff at houses around me, some traffic noise – they are the sounds of my world, my neighbourhood, my home. Taking 5 minutes lets your soul catch up – and when it does you have more focus for what you have to do next.

So often I hear people say they need to pay attention to their spirituality, you can do it every day, in this very simple way – listening to the world around you; listening to people, to the rhythms of our daily lives… and when we listen that leads to observing, and when we observe that leads to feelings, intuition and being connected.


Monday Muse on Tuesday 4 November

Posted by jackiepope on November 4, 2014

Monday Muse on Tuesday

I am doing this today because I had nothing to muse about yesterday – well actually I did have something to muse about… but it would have upset some people and I didn’t want to do that… so I erred on the side of being conservative.

Today I have something else to muse on… I feel rather odd. I feel as if I have been fired from a job; or like the day you leave school. Suddenly your world is changed and you have to go find something to do, or get used to life being a different way.

I went to Oncology clinic, which I have been doing for 6 months or so; and the doctor explained my new therapy – which is hormone therapy and will last 5 years. She handed me the script and said ‘a nurse will call you in three months and if there are no issues we will see you once every six months, or maybe once a year, you can get refills for the hormone therapy from your GP.’

That’s it; its over. I am officially done. No more blood tests, no more clinic every 21 days; nothing… empty. I was not expecting it. I thought I would be hooked into the system for months to come. No, its over…. it’s like a relationship breaking up. Life really is getting back to normal.

It happens to all of us in some shape or form; a relationship breaking up; suddenly leaving a job without warning; and you are left floating.

The positive thing is that now I can plan; I am not tied into the system – I am free. A major milestone in this journey.

The other good thing is energy is returning, and I am starting personal readings again. Thursday, Friday and Saturday mornings, only three or four a week. Also I am only reading for established clients – you fabulous people who have supported me throughout this last few months.

So here I am, free. Totally unexpected; its a good thing, but very very odd, and coming right on full moon. Of course I will celebrate; because it is a wonderful thing….. it is time to start creating the life I want for myself.